I sat pen poised, staring at the blank page in my journal.
I read the daily writing prompt………If there was one question you could have answered what would it be?
The words that appeared in my mind shocked me, frightened me almost.
Is this really what I wonder?
Is this the question I seek answers to?
In denial I tried to move on, walking away in an attempt to refresh my mind.
The question lingered, dragged up to the surface and toying with my conscious mind.
What is wrong with me?
I realise now I have asked and answered this question many times over many years. I have been on a long self help quest to fix myself, to change me, to fit in and to be ‘alright’.
I wasn’t invited to the cool kids party……What is wrong with me?
I didn’t get the job……….What is wrong with me?
My child isn’t sleeping through the night……….What is wrong with me as a Mum?
The answers have steered me toward a clear view of my failings, have drawn attention to my disappointments and have sent a steady stream of self doubt through my mind for years.
Ask what is wrong with you and you will find answers.
Answers that will squash your dreams, hold you back and ultimately leave you to live a fraction of the life you are capable of living.
I returned to my blank page and turned the question around.
I then wrote……..What is right with me?
My pen began to move slowly at first, I was censoring my answers and almost judging myself.
I was tempted to quit, feeling awkward as I squirmed in my seat and still I kept the pen moving.
The more I wrote the lighter and brighter I felt and finally the page was filled.
I now looked at the world though a lens of possibility, while wearing my own armour of strength.
Rejection, set backs and failures are all part of living a full and glorious life. The way you handle them will determine how full and glorious your life becomes.
Instead of dwelling on what is not working and approaching your disappointments with a desire to fix, change and alter yourself take a moment to sit down and think about; What is right with you.
What are your strengths?
What do you do well?
Then swirl it all together and use it.
We are all unique and talented individuals and the world needs more of you, exactly how you are.