What to do when life is not what you imagined

Its been six incredible months since we made our ‘big move’ north.  Since then I’ve experienced the most amazing moments with my family.

We’ve swam, walked and danced along the beach more times than I can count.

We’ve woken to strange bird calls and hosted an incredible array of wildlife (curlews and roos in the backyard anyone?)

We’ve learned to dodge monster spider webs, co-exist with critters and embrace mozzie eating geckos.

We’ve visited theme parks, played in creeks and taken long forest walks.

We’ve attended a full moon ceremony on the beach, bought produce from local farmers and tried many new cafes and cuisines.

And to our delight….   we’ve hosted many generous guests who’ve flown here to add their energy and warmth to our new home.

I’ve been asked many times “How I am?”  “What it’s like?” and “How I’m going?”

My honest answer…  “It’s not what I expected.”  In many ways its even better, and in other ways it’s challenging and messy.

I’m riding a rollercoaster of uncertainty and experimentation.  Having thoughts, discoveries and emotions I never experienced in my ‘safe’ Melbourne bubble of familiarity.

I’ve broken routines, created new ones and toyed with ‘by the seat of my pants’ along the way.

I’ve attended events alone, met new people and pined for the community vibe I once felt.

I’ve binge watched Netflix, attended an essential oils convention and stop-started more work projects than I can count.

I’ve learnt how to weave baskets, make Mala bead necklaces and gazed at the moon while setting intentions.

I’ve also experienced a sense of disconnection and isolation that has knocked the confidence out of me…  Something I didn’t expect.

I’ve avoided filling the gaps that haunt me, so I can move through my emotions to a place of healing.

I’ve journaled with tears dripping on the page.

I’ve meditated daily, quit meditating and gone back to meditating often.

I’ve remained open, honest and curious during late night conversations with my sister, while struggling to understand my swirling feelings.

I’ve found ways to sit in discomfort, embrace mystery and enjoy my own company.

And… I’ve lost momentum, as I patiently uncover the next path forward.

My future is uncertain, unplanned for the first time in a long time and that frustrates and excites me.

These six months have stripped away the mundane, removed the clutter and over commitment releasing me into a pool of options and opportunities.

I now get to choose actions that create the reality of my dreams.

You see, all things are created twice.  First in your mind and then in reality and the reality may not always be what you expected.

The seed of your dream is only the beginning.

That lingering thought tugging away at your heart, wanting permission to grow.

The change you desire. The ideas you keep having.  The imagined life you know one day you want.

The seed of a future you can nourish or you can suppress.

Do nothing and you could carry that seed all the way to your grave. Or do something and give it life.

Begin by giving yourself permission to want more.

Start exploring your desires, seeking to understand them.  Talk about what you want, to write it down, declare it somehow.

And know that the future is listening.  So be clear about what you want and remain open to how things could unfold.

The tree of reality will sprout once you nourish and nurture your dreams, even the wildest ones.

Trust me, reality has the potential to branch out and offer you more than anything you’re imagining today.

Embrace what’s on its way to you and allow new paths to be revealed.