The text said lunch. I cringed, it was my busy week and I really didn’t want to go.
I knew they’d be disappointed if I said no.
I felt bad, ungrateful. It’s nice to be included.
I replied yes and marked the calendar.
The day arrived and I felt that twinge of dread again.
I even had a whinge to my hubby that morning.
Why did I say yes?
Its’ not that I couldn’t go, I just didn’t feel like it and wanted some time to myself.
I should go. I always go. Its rude not to go.
I arrived, joining in with the idle chit chat and ordered a cuppa.
As the volume went up I fell silent.
My mind wandering as I mentally left the room.
How long should I stay to be polite?
Would anyone notice if I left?
Whats’ wrong with me?
Saying yes when you want to say no is the quickest way to suck the joy out of your day.
It can leave you resentful and frustrated as you try to back out.
For a very long time this was the case for me.
I would say yes and then kick myself later.
I would say yes and show up even when I was running on empty.
I would over commit even when I had done my fair share.
There are limits to our energy, our attention and our time and when we push beyond those limits we are not at our best.
It is okay to simply say no because it’s how you feel.
When that nudge inside you says give this one a miss, honour it, honour you.
Instead of doing ‘the right thing’ and aiming to please everyone, offer a polite and honest no.
It can be hard to say no, I find it difficult too.
I don’t want to let people down.
I want to be liked.
I want to be the one you can count on.
More than all of this I want to be happy and I am not happy when I am trying to do it all.
It takes practice and a strong commitment to a live a life you love.
Know what matters most, what supports you and say no to the rest.
And remember; when you do say NO you give your YES much more value.
That’s right, once you can say No your YES will begin to mean so much more.
What could be better than that?
What do you want to say no to?
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