It was like a wave crashing down over me.
Starting deep in my chest as a dull, heavy ache. Then slowly travelling to my throat, leaving me gasping for air as its grip tightened and formed a big knot.
Then to my facial muscles causing them to twitch, stretch and move. Fighting was useless I had no control.
Finally the hot wet sting met my eyes and as the tears rolled down my cheeks I felt the urge to sniff, and sniff and sniff. To add to this, not so very glamorous moment, I have had a very nasty cold for 11 days now and my nose was about to unleash a torrent of “stuff” I will spare you from.
In amongst all the crazy facial dances and the endless streams of tears there was also a huge sense of relief.
Yes I was having one big, messy, ugly cry and once it began it seemed to never want to stop
I had a messy ugly cry today because the realisation finally kicked in.
I had a messy ugly cry today knowing my friend and her family rose shortly before dawn to embark on a new incredible adventure.
I had a messy ugly cry today knowing she had already begun the 900km drive to her new home.
I had a messy ugly cry today knowing I will no longer hear “I’ll be there in 2 minutes!”
I had a messy ugly cry today knowing we would no longer share a spice grinder.
I had a messy ugly cry today knowing our happy hour drinkies would now require a plane trip.
I had a messy ugly cry today wondering if I had taken too much for granted.
I had a messy ugly cry today thinking I had wasted precious time together.
I had a messy ugly cry today remembering how much we had laughed.
I had a messy ugly cry today for all those times I judged our differences.
I had a messy ugly cry today for all those times I embraced our differences.
I had a messy ugly cry today for every meal, moment and memory we shared.
I had a messy ugly cry today because when someone touches your life this much, when they leave a messy ugly cry is the best thing to do.
I had a messy ugly cry today and I now feel a little better.
I had a messy ugly cry today because I already miss my friend.

We should all be so blessed with a friend that special <3. Hugs to you from the US
Thanks Tressie, blessed is very true.
Good luck to your friend on her adventure, and you will always be in each other’s hearts. It’s still so sad. And I totally get that when you have a cold and then you have a messy ugly cry (although I doubt you really could possibly look ugly!) and it totally helps the cold too. Clears the sinuses.
Anyway, this is beautiful.
Tamara life will not be the same without her living around the corner, I do expect some awesome holiday trips are in store instead for us.
And yes the sinus’s got a clearing.
You are so lucky to have a friendship that deep, that precious. Miles won’t damped than friendship. And as for “happy hour drinkies…” there’s always Skype 🙂
Rebecca, Skype happy hour drinkies now your talking. Thank you
A friend like that will surely stay in your life, even if it’s from a little further away! Wonderful 🙂
Rachel I do hope so, great friends are such a blessing.
You’re Right! There are some situations and some PEOPLE who deserve an absolute Messy Ugly Cry!
Tiffany and to think i was trying to hold it all in.
Love when you stop by.
So beautiful. I know I would feel this exact same way if my best friend were far away. You said it beautifully.
Absolutely nothing wrong with that.
I’m glad I found you from the sits sharefest 🙂 excited to have a look around. ~Jenna
Jenna, thanks for your kind comments. When our friends are close by it is difficult to imagine life any other way. The ugly messy cry was way overdue and you are right there is nothing wrong with that.
I’ve had some ugly messy cries myself over friends moving away. I hope you two will be able to connect on Skype and still laugh or cry together 🙂
Christy those ugly messy cries are often needed, although I held it in for a while. I am sure there will be lots of connections online and a trip or 2 in the future.
Friendships are special. Start planning your trip to visit her and schedule calls daily! Just because you guys aren’t physically close doesn’t mean you aren’t still close! 🙂
Taylor the first trip is being planned already. Great advice thank you.
I almost had a big messy cry while reading about yours! My dearest friend lives too far to share much without the internet, but we are all blessed to make such wonderful friends.
Thank you for sharing such a messy, universal feeling so beautifully.
Kim I already have 2 very dear friends living hours and hours away by plane, and now 3. Like you it has been the internet and FB that help us stay so up to date with each other. Lucky I love my time online.
So thrilled you stopped by.
It’s truly terrible to miss an amazing friend as you have described. I’m glad the ugly cry made you feel a little better 🙂
Visiting from SITS
I’m glad the ugly cry made you feel better.
Yes Meg emotions are better out than in.