I have been feeling that gushy feeling for a few days now.
I am affected
A bit moonstruck
I didn’t recognise the emotion at first, it crept up on me.
I heard myself say to a friend the other day “Roy is the best person for me, he knows just how to handle my intensity”. I felt the tug on my heart as I said it.
I still didn’t recognise it.
Then the song came on the radio this afternoon.
Shania Twain – You’re Still the One
Looks like we made it
Look how far we’ve come my baby
We mighta took the long way
We knew we’d get there someday……….
You’re Still the One I run to
The one that I belong to
You’re still the one I want for life
You’re Still the one that i love
The only one I dream of
You’re still the one I kiss good night………
As I sang along I was taken back to the year we were married, the song, the words, the significance, the nostalgia.
Then it hit me.
I am going away with a couple of awesome friends for four days.
I am leaving Roy and the kids at home.
Yes I expect it to be difficult leaving the kids. They are with their Dad, they are 8 and 6. They will be fine.
What gets me all gushy is leaving Roy.
You see we have been together for 25 years this year.
He knows me, he gets me, he is always my Roy.
When I am unsettled he settles me.
When I can’t stop he stops me.
When I need space he gives it to me.
When I don’t know what I need, he knows what I need.
I have always felt a piece is missing when I am away from him.
I take him for granted often, he has been with me the majority of my life and I know he will be around for the rest.
Not only does absence make the heart grow fonder, the thought of absence has already melted mine.
Yes I will have an amazing time away.
Yes my heart will open a bit wider and feel a love I have held onto for 25 years a little bit deeper.
I am nostalgic
I am in love