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I thought I couldn’t change for 30 years and then found out its not true

August 5, 2016 By Karen Main Leave a Comment

change
I’m not good with change….. I’ve said this many times.

And until a few years ago I believed it was true.

I honestly thought that change was something I struggled with and I avoided making changes whenever possible.

Over the years I’ve said no to jobs, moves, adventures and travel for fear of change. Which is why I’ve lived in my first home for 20 years, in the neighbourhood I also grew up in.  And why I worked for the same company for 17 years.

It all started when I was a kid, I struggled starting high school. Really struggled. Tears most mornings, tantrums most afternoons and endless trips to sick bay begging to go home. Until one day I heard these words from the principal.  “She’s just not good with change.” and I believed it.

I believed I didn’t cope well with change and that’s how I lived for the next 30 years.  Afraid to be free and make great change.

Until I turned 40…   That (almost half way) point of life when many of us question what we’re doing, and what our life is all about.  I imagined my future without much change and all I could see was a deeply sad, old woman trapped in a life with no adventure, vibrancy and fun. (Dramatic but it worked)

This scared me more than the thought of change.  I didn’t want to be an unfulfilled, sad, hag, living a safe and bland life.

I didn’t want to miss out on the excitement of adventures.  I wanted to live a bright and joy filled life?

So I wrote down my wildest dreams and noted all the things I’ve ever said I wanted to do.  And I asked the hard questions.
Why wasn’t I going after my dreams?
Why was I scared I wouldn’t cope?

And then came…   Who says I’m not good with change?  Maybe it’s not even true.  Imagine that!

There was only one way to find out.

I made some changes. And then some more.  I started out small and manageable.  Like driving home a different way and going to different supermarkets.

I coped fine and gained confidence.

Then came the greatest change of all.   I changed the story I was telling myself.

I know now that I’m great at making changes and I like to make changes in my own way, in my own time.

It’s taken a few years and I am proud to say I’m now free of this stifling belief and excitedly alive.  I’m enjoying change, embracing change and dare I say craving change.

I’m not comparing or judging the way I go about it, I’m simply getting on with creating my dream life and doing more of what feels good.

Maybe you believe your too shy, disorganised, unqualified, bossy, loud…    to ever do what you really want to do.

And my questions for you are simple…  SAYS WHO?   IS IT EVEN TRUE?

Don’t build a box out of your limiting beliefs and then squeeze your life into it.

Open wide to what you want. Take a chance. Challenge yourself. Find your own way.

We are all capable of achieving more than we can ever imagine, we just need to let go and do things in our own unique way.

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Filed Under: Growth and Learning, Outside your Comfort Zone Tagged With: belief, change, limiting belief

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Meet Karen

Karen Main is a Life Leadership Coach for people who are ready to make a change in their lives.
Through her coaching, workshops and speaking gigs she’s here to help you design a life you love — while making it all feel like a celebration.
And when she’s not working, you can find her indulging in a long walk with the dog, laughing with her kids or at her favourite yoga class Read More…

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